Confused And Slightly Caffeinated

Last Friday, I sat in the truck in front of my house at 6:25 a.m. with a blanket, a cup of coffee and my cell phone. I was hiding from my noisy children and awaiting a phone call from the Horses In The Morning podcast. I was nervous, and not just because it was spitting snow and I wanted to haul a couch home from town after the interview.

In 5 years of working as a journalist, I had interviewed a couple hundred people. But this was my first experience being the interviewee. I hoped the hosts wouldn’t ask any hard questions like “What’s your middle name?” because I wasn’t sure I could answer that under pressure.

Going into the interview, I had no idea what to expect. The show was about horses, so maybe were they going to ask me how many bones are in the equine skeleton and to define “cremello.” I wasn’t up on all the proper equine terms – would they make fun of me if I said “ankle” instead of “fetlock”?

Then I was live on the air. I was confused, slightly caffeinated, and talking up a storm. In case you don’t have time to listen to my full 20-minute interview, here’s a recap.

-Glenn, one of the two co-hosts, was flabbergasted by how far we live from town. We recently moved to the Triangle N camp of the O RO Ranch, so now we are 2 1/2 hours from Prescott. This location would not work for Glenn, because he apparently goes to the grocery store 57 times a week.

-Glenn’s co-host Jamie jokingly suggested a movie or reality show could be in our future, but I’m not sure if anyone except the grandparents would tune in on a regular basis to watch me yell “Milo, quit playing on the anthill!” and teach Grace how to sing “Five Little Ducks.” Besides, if a TV production crew followed me around all day, I’d be like, “Put that camera down, grab a load of laundry and start hanging it on the clothesline. Ranch life is a participation activity, not a spectator event.”

-I only cussed once. It was just a li’l ole h-bomb, so I was pretty proud of myself. Fact: Mommy has a potty mouth. It’s something to work on, like cleaning my bath tub and flossing on a regular basis.

-Jamie said that from looking at my website, it was clear that I had an “amazing husband and family.” Of all the interview’s 20 minutes, Jim is of course pretty hung up on that one line. It’s like he didn’t even hear all my witty remarks and snappy retorts.

If you’re interested, you can listen to the podcast here. Go to 31:30 if you want to skip to my part, but feel free to listen to the other interviews as well. You’ll learn a little more about what it’s like living down this long, long dirt road.